Hi All
Just wanted to apologise for being MIA for so long - I've been on a long madass trip around China and Blogger is blocked there so I've been unable to log on. I kept a travel journal the entire time, so will post it all up - most of it will be boring and long-winded, but it is more for my own records so you don't have to read it :P
The other news is that I've decided to change the URL for my blog. Gracie is the Best OK is waaaaay passé. Right now the new blog looks kinda shitty and I haven't done up any background or banner for it, but will work on fixing it soon.
So please bookmark my new URL @ http://lifeofgracieplusone.blogspot.com and keep reading!
Luv Much
Gracie xx
Saturday, 9 June 2012
Tuesday, 20 March 2012
Why I hate Mothers Groups
Mothers groups. The banal creation of flaky stay-at-home mums who have nothing better to do all day than to goss and yabber on and about their kids. Sometimes their boring husbands too.
Can I please rant?
Apart from the obvious good that it does for my son, who does indeed gain some interaction and learning from the other kids, it is void of any other purpose in my life. Except that it completely drains me and gives me a big fucking headache each and every time.
Since I love lists, I'm going to make one about all these reasons why these groups are the bane of my existence to date.
1) The kids will be fine. Seriously.
Every mother thinks they're gonna kill their kids by doing something wrong in the beginning. I thought so too. That was before Jaydon started being independent, growing a personality, and frankly just being normal. Then I realised that no matter how much you stress about that rash, or that cough, or the midnight fevers and tears from teething, it doesn't really do any good to sit in a group with a bunch of other women who may or may not have experienced the same thing. All their genius advice will be on Google anyway, except Google just gives you the facts without telling you that horror birth story (again) and then comparing caesarean scars with you. Your kid will grow up fine. They all do.
2) My life is waiting.
Every minute I spend talking about when you should start potty training, whether you should have your third child (even though you're still pregnant with the second), and whether its ok that your son ate dog poop again this morning - is a minute I have NOT spent on reading the news, writing my book, doing research on my travels, learning something, or having a drink. Please don't induct me into your weird cult of mummy do-gooders and brainwash me like those Invisible Children people did to the world. Those are 30minutes I'll never get back again. Even the Ugandans don't like you.
3) The boasting mum
You know the one. She's always gushing about how intelligent her kids are, how they just learnt a new skill, how cute they were this morning when they did this/that, how good-looking they are etc. This type of mum usually has the whole group wanting to groan and roll their eyes, but everyone is too polite to say anything because we all have kids and would hate it if someone else did that to us. So we all deal with it and gush along with her while comparing our caesarean scars.
4) The judgemental mum
This mum is the worst. She judges everyone - the working mothers, the ones who don't cook, those who do or don't send their kids to daycare, as well as those who choose not to have kids (just unacceptable). Most of the time, this mum has her own trail of badly behaved brats, runs a chaotic household, and has those crazy eyes that get really big when she's being incredulous. Which is all the time. A bit like that redhead from Desperate Housewives. But fatter.
5) Mummy fashion
Why does everyone wear mummy jeans and look frumpy at these things? I have to admit it's much better in Asia, especially Korea, but there is no denying the "mummy-ness" of these congregations where flats and long cardis are the norm. Maybe cos everyone's fat. Which makes me feel worse cos it is NO indication of what the rest of society looks like, but I start thinking its normal and then give up on myself. Hello? I'm a fashion columnist. I need to look good in order to have content. I'll lose my job.
OK, don't get me wrong. This is a generic rant, not a mass rape against all mothers groups or my friends. And I do like to attend these things occasionally, especially when its with friends I haven't seen for a while. In fact, I am certain there are plenty of professional/interesting/avant-garde mothers who must attend highly sophisticated mothers group meetings that consist of adult conversation with just a sprinkling of child advice. I am just yet to find one. Here's to hoping!
Can I please rant?
Apart from the obvious good that it does for my son, who does indeed gain some interaction and learning from the other kids, it is void of any other purpose in my life. Except that it completely drains me and gives me a big fucking headache each and every time.
Since I love lists, I'm going to make one about all these reasons why these groups are the bane of my existence to date.
1) The kids will be fine. Seriously.
Every mother thinks they're gonna kill their kids by doing something wrong in the beginning. I thought so too. That was before Jaydon started being independent, growing a personality, and frankly just being normal. Then I realised that no matter how much you stress about that rash, or that cough, or the midnight fevers and tears from teething, it doesn't really do any good to sit in a group with a bunch of other women who may or may not have experienced the same thing. All their genius advice will be on Google anyway, except Google just gives you the facts without telling you that horror birth story (again) and then comparing caesarean scars with you. Your kid will grow up fine. They all do.
2) My life is waiting.
Every minute I spend talking about when you should start potty training, whether you should have your third child (even though you're still pregnant with the second), and whether its ok that your son ate dog poop again this morning - is a minute I have NOT spent on reading the news, writing my book, doing research on my travels, learning something, or having a drink. Please don't induct me into your weird cult of mummy do-gooders and brainwash me like those Invisible Children people did to the world. Those are 30minutes I'll never get back again. Even the Ugandans don't like you.
3) The boasting mum
You know the one. She's always gushing about how intelligent her kids are, how they just learnt a new skill, how cute they were this morning when they did this/that, how good-looking they are etc. This type of mum usually has the whole group wanting to groan and roll their eyes, but everyone is too polite to say anything because we all have kids and would hate it if someone else did that to us. So we all deal with it and gush along with her while comparing our caesarean scars.
4) The judgemental mum
This mum is the worst. She judges everyone - the working mothers, the ones who don't cook, those who do or don't send their kids to daycare, as well as those who choose not to have kids (just unacceptable). Most of the time, this mum has her own trail of badly behaved brats, runs a chaotic household, and has those crazy eyes that get really big when she's being incredulous. Which is all the time. A bit like that redhead from Desperate Housewives. But fatter.
5) Mummy fashion
Why does everyone wear mummy jeans and look frumpy at these things? I have to admit it's much better in Asia, especially Korea, but there is no denying the "mummy-ness" of these congregations where flats and long cardis are the norm. Maybe cos everyone's fat. Which makes me feel worse cos it is NO indication of what the rest of society looks like, but I start thinking its normal and then give up on myself. Hello? I'm a fashion columnist. I need to look good in order to have content. I'll lose my job.
OK, don't get me wrong. This is a generic rant, not a mass rape against all mothers groups or my friends. And I do like to attend these things occasionally, especially when its with friends I haven't seen for a while. In fact, I am certain there are plenty of professional/interesting/avant-garde mothers who must attend highly sophisticated mothers group meetings that consist of adult conversation with just a sprinkling of child advice. I am just yet to find one. Here's to hoping!
Thursday, 23 February 2012
Different Types of Mothers
I'm a pretty sucky mum. Most of the time I wake up late, let the nanny make breakfast for Little J, play with him a little and then spend the rest of the day at Starbucks writing. On weekends I'm usually hungover, and my long suffering husband is, more often than not, the one that spends half the weekend attending to our 14 month old while I lie there, unable to get out of bed.
You could very easily conclude that I have it easy. And I'm not here to debate whether "having it easy" means you do less housework or cook less. Anyone that's not a hater or an idiot knows that there is no household in the world that doesn't come with its own set of disasters, tragedies and a big thick crisis manual.
So what does it mean to be a good mother? Is catering to your child's every need, watching over them like a hawk and never allowing them a moment of suffering the answer? Perhaps for some, but not so for others. I have many friends with kids, and each are so different in their own way. Every single one of them is a powerful force to be reckoned with, capable of lifting mountains and spinning cups on their heads.
Here's a snapshot of a few prototypes:
The Weekend Mum
I only have one friend like this, and she is perhaps the most similar to me. Headstrong and dedicated, like me she went back to work a month after giving birth and her baby daughter lives with her mother on weekdays due to her long hours. She has no help on weekends either, so she and her husband have become the sort we all love to hate - the weekend parents. Sadly, this is also true of my own household. I understand her reasons for making this choice, and truly believe that it is the best choice for her. In Oliver James' book "How not to F them up", he describes Type-A personalities as the best type to go back to work. As long as your child is getting very good care, he says, you are better off doing your own thing than suffering at home doing a half-hearted job on someone who you will undoubtedly blame later pin for your failures.
The Supermum
Infuriatingly energetic, optimistic, and usually an encyclopaedia on all things, this mum is the type that lives on air, or her own saliva or something. She works or has her own business, has a couple of kids, and still manages to get it all right. I know one like this, and most of the time I just want to thump her with my shoe because I can't believe how together she is. But of course, I wouldn't want to ruin my MiuMius so I don't. I used to think I was this type, and I probably was at one stage, but right now I most certainly am not. My philosophy is that SMs can never be such indefinitely. There is always a period in their lives where they become either a Weekend Mum out of pure necessity or the Stay-At-Home Mum cos she's just so damn tired.
The Stay-At-Home Yummy Mummy
Usually well-off, though not necessarily better off emotionally than her counterpart (the Poor Mummy), this lovely lady can buy whatever she wants except her dignity. Most wealthy Korean mums are like this. Some have help, some don't. They can afford luxuries, go lunching often with other YMs, but are usually very much under then thumb of their super successful husband and/or his super wealthy family. Of course, this is never evident on the surface. YMs would never admit it, but somewhere deep down there is an insecurity that stems from the belief that if she lost him she would have nothing, and so she treats him well and puts up with most of the annoying things that the Weekend Mum otherwise wouldn't.
The Stay-At-Home Poor Mummy
She may be poor, but my experience with PMs is that they usually have a great husband who is very hands on and gives a lot of time to the family. This is of course, a generalisation, but as I am subjectively only talking about the small group of mummies that I know and this is my blog, lets allow this discrepancy. The PM most definitely has no help, she looks like shit most of the time, and she does EVERYTHING around the house. She usually has more than one child, but they are very well behaved. I love PMs. I also love poor kids. I want to raise Jaydon as one, they always get further in life. I am not trying to be funny.
The Single Mum
This is the mum that has it the hardest. No help, no husband, doing it all on their own. I have much admiration for this mother as my own was one of these. There are too many of them around and I know a fair few - some divorced, some separated, some who did it all alone because the father left before the child was even born. These women are performing acts of true sacrifice and love. Enough said.
You could very easily conclude that I have it easy. And I'm not here to debate whether "having it easy" means you do less housework or cook less. Anyone that's not a hater or an idiot knows that there is no household in the world that doesn't come with its own set of disasters, tragedies and a big thick crisis manual.
So what does it mean to be a good mother? Is catering to your child's every need, watching over them like a hawk and never allowing them a moment of suffering the answer? Perhaps for some, but not so for others. I have many friends with kids, and each are so different in their own way. Every single one of them is a powerful force to be reckoned with, capable of lifting mountains and spinning cups on their heads.
Here's a snapshot of a few prototypes:
The Weekend Mum
I only have one friend like this, and she is perhaps the most similar to me. Headstrong and dedicated, like me she went back to work a month after giving birth and her baby daughter lives with her mother on weekdays due to her long hours. She has no help on weekends either, so she and her husband have become the sort we all love to hate - the weekend parents. Sadly, this is also true of my own household. I understand her reasons for making this choice, and truly believe that it is the best choice for her. In Oliver James' book "How not to F them up", he describes Type-A personalities as the best type to go back to work. As long as your child is getting very good care, he says, you are better off doing your own thing than suffering at home doing a half-hearted job on someone who you will undoubtedly blame later pin for your failures.
The Supermum
Infuriatingly energetic, optimistic, and usually an encyclopaedia on all things, this mum is the type that lives on air, or her own saliva or something. She works or has her own business, has a couple of kids, and still manages to get it all right. I know one like this, and most of the time I just want to thump her with my shoe because I can't believe how together she is. But of course, I wouldn't want to ruin my MiuMius so I don't. I used to think I was this type, and I probably was at one stage, but right now I most certainly am not. My philosophy is that SMs can never be such indefinitely. There is always a period in their lives where they become either a Weekend Mum out of pure necessity or the Stay-At-Home Mum cos she's just so damn tired.
The Stay-At-Home Yummy Mummy
Usually well-off, though not necessarily better off emotionally than her counterpart (the Poor Mummy), this lovely lady can buy whatever she wants except her dignity. Most wealthy Korean mums are like this. Some have help, some don't. They can afford luxuries, go lunching often with other YMs, but are usually very much under then thumb of their super successful husband and/or his super wealthy family. Of course, this is never evident on the surface. YMs would never admit it, but somewhere deep down there is an insecurity that stems from the belief that if she lost him she would have nothing, and so she treats him well and puts up with most of the annoying things that the Weekend Mum otherwise wouldn't.
The Stay-At-Home Poor Mummy
She may be poor, but my experience with PMs is that they usually have a great husband who is very hands on and gives a lot of time to the family. This is of course, a generalisation, but as I am subjectively only talking about the small group of mummies that I know and this is my blog, lets allow this discrepancy. The PM most definitely has no help, she looks like shit most of the time, and she does EVERYTHING around the house. She usually has more than one child, but they are very well behaved. I love PMs. I also love poor kids. I want to raise Jaydon as one, they always get further in life. I am not trying to be funny.
The Single Mum
This is the mum that has it the hardest. No help, no husband, doing it all on their own. I have much admiration for this mother as my own was one of these. There are too many of them around and I know a fair few - some divorced, some separated, some who did it all alone because the father left before the child was even born. These women are performing acts of true sacrifice and love. Enough said.
Weekend parents means really fun weekends :D
Thursday, 9 February 2012
Writers Block
Wow I'm hopeless. So much for updating every week...
In my defence, I've been in China. I took a little sabbatical for myself for 10 days, sans husband and child. It was good for me. I wrote, reflected, drank a lot, fell down the stairs, fought with an ex-bf who just suddenly turned up at my hotel for a day, got kicked out of my hotel for misbehaviour, managed to also get involved in a street fight, and sat on the beach in the dead of a snowy winter.
And no, I don't want to explain.
I also fell in love again... with my country.
There are times when I look at my life and the things I've been through and I have to say that I am, more so than the average person, one that lives passionately and thrives on drama. I'm a butterfly, still yet to find my way, still yet to find a home. I live on on the cusp of extremities, never settling for the simple or the mundane. I am an enigma, even I do not understand myself.
Someone reminded me today of something that Deepak Chopra said: If money was of no concern and you had all the time in the world, what would you be doing with your life?
I guess I'm there now. What should I be doing? I went to China with the intention of writing, which I did. But at times it felt like I took 10 steps back each time I took 2 steps forwards. Writers block is a myth... its called fear and insecurity.
Motherhood is but one of my branches - being a mother, a daughter, a sister, a professional, a writer - are other branches of this naked tree. But I can't do any of these things well without being me. Sometimes I feel that marriage and family has made me lose myself, but the truth is that I cannot have any of these branches without roots and the root is my family.
I made my husband cry yesterday. I seem to do it a lot.
I guess I'm an onion. Sometimes you have to peel down the layers, and sometimes you weep.
In my defence, I've been in China. I took a little sabbatical for myself for 10 days, sans husband and child. It was good for me. I wrote, reflected, drank a lot, fell down the stairs, fought with an ex-bf who just suddenly turned up at my hotel for a day, got kicked out of my hotel for misbehaviour, managed to also get involved in a street fight, and sat on the beach in the dead of a snowy winter.
And no, I don't want to explain.
I also fell in love again... with my country.
There are times when I look at my life and the things I've been through and I have to say that I am, more so than the average person, one that lives passionately and thrives on drama. I'm a butterfly, still yet to find my way, still yet to find a home. I live on on the cusp of extremities, never settling for the simple or the mundane. I am an enigma, even I do not understand myself.
Someone reminded me today of something that Deepak Chopra said: If money was of no concern and you had all the time in the world, what would you be doing with your life?
I guess I'm there now. What should I be doing? I went to China with the intention of writing, which I did. But at times it felt like I took 10 steps back each time I took 2 steps forwards. Writers block is a myth... its called fear and insecurity.
Motherhood is but one of my branches - being a mother, a daughter, a sister, a professional, a writer - are other branches of this naked tree. But I can't do any of these things well without being me. Sometimes I feel that marriage and family has made me lose myself, but the truth is that I cannot have any of these branches without roots and the root is my family.
I made my husband cry yesterday. I seem to do it a lot.
I guess I'm an onion. Sometimes you have to peel down the layers, and sometimes you weep.
Dusk from my window, Qingdao
Friday, 6 January 2012
Jaydon's 1st Bday
Some pics from Jaydon's Dol (1st Bday Party)
Have over 300 pics to sort through! Will put them up on facebook soon :))
Have over 300 pics to sort through! Will put them up on facebook soon :))
I'm not Supermum
Hell no. And this trip to China cemented that fact.
Jaydon was a nightmare - he literally brought new meaning to the words "separation anxiety". I hired a nanny, put us up in the Intercon Club Lounge, did everything I could to make sure he was comfortable, but no - this kid cannot be fooled. He knew he was in a strange place with strange people. Any time a person would go up to him he would scream like a hyena and grab my leg for dear life. If anyone tried to touch or hold him he would freak out and make teradactyl noises until they backed away. Have never been so embarressed in my life.
He wouldn't sleep in the crib, so I had to hold him the entire night and even then he would startle me 3x a night screaming from some nightmare (probably to do with FOBs trying to get him). He would then wake up at 7am as usual and start the whole thing again.
I decided 2 days in that this could not do, so I left him with the nanny on NYE to cry it out and I went out.
MISTAKE!!
I came home at 6am to find that he cried the entire night before passing out. 1hr into my alcohol-induced slumber, he was up again - but this time with laryngitis and a runny nose from all the crying. FML indeed.
How do other mums do it? Do they just drop everything and tend to their kids needs 24hrs a day? Is that sort of sacrifice beautiful, or suffocating? Judge me, but I believe in letting your kids suffer - just a little - not just for the sake of your sanity, but the sake of theirs. What spoilt little rich brat turns out to be any good when they grow up? It's only those who suffered that become something, someone of virtue. I give my child affection - a lot of it. But I also walk away sometimes when he is fine, and I dont pick him up when he falls. I have a 1 year old who knows how to put his hands together for a prayer before every meal, and who shakes his head "no" to himself when he is doing something wrong. I think I'm doing ok.
After that wretched night, Little J stopped his nonsense and went back to his normal self - happy, extroverted and a naughty pain in the bum. He did lose his voice for a few days, but I must say it was quite nice indeed...
I'm not perfect. I have help, I don't do the dirty work, I still live my life. Perhaps I have too much. But I believe that it takes a village to raise a child. We have a strong and sturdy village here. And I bow down to anyone that is doing it alone. You are heroes, of the most exceptional kind.
Jaydon was a nightmare - he literally brought new meaning to the words "separation anxiety". I hired a nanny, put us up in the Intercon Club Lounge, did everything I could to make sure he was comfortable, but no - this kid cannot be fooled. He knew he was in a strange place with strange people. Any time a person would go up to him he would scream like a hyena and grab my leg for dear life. If anyone tried to touch or hold him he would freak out and make teradactyl noises until they backed away. Have never been so embarressed in my life.
He wouldn't sleep in the crib, so I had to hold him the entire night and even then he would startle me 3x a night screaming from some nightmare (probably to do with FOBs trying to get him). He would then wake up at 7am as usual and start the whole thing again.
I decided 2 days in that this could not do, so I left him with the nanny on NYE to cry it out and I went out.
MISTAKE!!
I came home at 6am to find that he cried the entire night before passing out. 1hr into my alcohol-induced slumber, he was up again - but this time with laryngitis and a runny nose from all the crying. FML indeed.
How do other mums do it? Do they just drop everything and tend to their kids needs 24hrs a day? Is that sort of sacrifice beautiful, or suffocating? Judge me, but I believe in letting your kids suffer - just a little - not just for the sake of your sanity, but the sake of theirs. What spoilt little rich brat turns out to be any good when they grow up? It's only those who suffered that become something, someone of virtue. I give my child affection - a lot of it. But I also walk away sometimes when he is fine, and I dont pick him up when he falls. I have a 1 year old who knows how to put his hands together for a prayer before every meal, and who shakes his head "no" to himself when he is doing something wrong. I think I'm doing ok.
After that wretched night, Little J stopped his nonsense and went back to his normal self - happy, extroverted and a naughty pain in the bum. He did lose his voice for a few days, but I must say it was quite nice indeed...
I'm not perfect. I have help, I don't do the dirty work, I still live my life. Perhaps I have too much. But I believe that it takes a village to raise a child. We have a strong and sturdy village here. And I bow down to anyone that is doing it alone. You are heroes, of the most exceptional kind.
Wednesday, 28 December 2011
One year on - I'm back :)
This comeback has been difficult for me.
For the last 12 months, I admit I have toiled with the idea of returning, but the benefits just seemed to outweigh the costs (aka. much needed sleep). I have received numerous emails from once-dedicated readers, and it moved me to say the least. I didn't know I had such a loyal following - my blog was never open to search engines - so the number of hits I got never failed to amaze me. For all of you out there that contacted me and encouraged me to start again: thank you.
The number two reason I failed to start up again (the number one being, obviously, my incredibly time-consuming son) was perhaps a maturing of sorts. I suddenly realised, after becoming a mum, that I had to shed a lot of layers and simplify my life. It was an awakening of sorts. I realised I no longer knew how to write just for the sake of writing, and that I was writing for others more than myself. I feared that being a mummy blogger would mean I would lose a lot of my readers who may no longer identify with me, that I would stumble into that all-consuming vacuum of baking cookies and going to play dates and never be able to get out.
Most of all I guess I feared criticism. Of being told that I'm wrong, I'm a bad mother, my methods and my ways are unorthodox. And as anyone that is a writer knows, if you're gonna to put it out there you are bound to have haters. Hey, I have haters even without a blog - someone wrote in criticising my fashion column not long ago and I absolutely LOVED it! It made me feel so empowered and ignited a spark in me. It may have been then that I decided I needed to write, write more, write well, and with the same ferocity as before, if not more.
So here's a recap of what's gone down in the past year...
I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy, and incredibly loved baby boy - last week was his first birthday :) I made the mistake of resuming work (from home) 1 month after I had him, and then the bigger mistake of continuing to work remotely while I was on vacation back home when he was 3 months old. Breastfeeding every 2hrs throughout the night, socialising with friends, and trying to catch up on work often at 4am in the morning resulted in a physical breakdown. I got a severe case of pneumonia and was on a hospital drip for 2 weeks. It was so bad that they thought I had TB and treated me like a leper in the isolation room. Everyone that came in had to wear a gown and a mask, I was not allowed out, and noone wanted to touch me. That's how I spent my first Mother's Day. Husbandless. Childless. Thank God for my mum who kept everything together for Little J and brought him in once a day so that I could let him cling desperately to my breast, sucking whatever driblet of milk I could muster up in the wake of all that medication.
Eventually I gave up as the illness left me dry and milkless and my useless mammary glands were no longer of any use to my boy, save for a couple of soft moulds on which he would leech onto for comfort. At that point, he could very well have been that half-vampire baby Renesmee killing me slowly...
But I resurrected myself and went back to the office. It was a decision that had taken me 6 months to make, and one that I do not regret. I thought Jaydon would hate me, that he would only want the nanny, but the truth is he loves me like nothing else! When I am home he clings to my legs and jumps up and down, demanding attention and hugs. He knows his mummy, and is a confident and deliriously happy boy. I am blessed.
The first year of motherhood in a nutshell? A series of ups and downs, of balancing acts, of not having the time or energy to speak more than 3 words to my husband a night (which were usually "get the milk"). In hindsight, I think my marriage was spread so thin that I give new meaning to the words "a mile wide but an inch deep"... I felt like I was trying to do everything at once but not a single thing was done properly.
Our trip to NYC & Hawaii was a savior of sorts. At the very least, we had full meals without interruption and sex two nights in a row. I missed my son terribly but it was definately good for my marriage.
It was a year of doing crazy dances - both figuratively and literally. Of alternating between jumping around like a chimpanzee to make my little one laugh to kowtowing to him with tears in my eyes, begging him to go the f* to sleep...
I still remember the time in Sydney when I drove one-handed down George street whilst clutching my boob with my breast pump in the other, frantically calling my friends on the hands free to let them know that - yes, indeed I will be on time for the movie - while the guy in the lane next to me just gawked. That was seriously a low point.
So now, here I am. Writing whatever comes to me, and feeling like that's exactly how I will continue. I would like this blog to become a collection of thoughts, rather than a documentation of what I've been doing lately. Hope that doesn't bore you all to bits, but I think I'll leave facebook to do the updating of the daily milestones and this to be an online journal for my grandkids to laugh about one day.
Right now I am packing for a trip to China for NYE, sans husband but with baby in tow. Jaydon's third trip overseas, and it just gets harder... Hope this spark remains with me when I get back!
G xxx
For the last 12 months, I admit I have toiled with the idea of returning, but the benefits just seemed to outweigh the costs (aka. much needed sleep). I have received numerous emails from once-dedicated readers, and it moved me to say the least. I didn't know I had such a loyal following - my blog was never open to search engines - so the number of hits I got never failed to amaze me. For all of you out there that contacted me and encouraged me to start again: thank you.
The number two reason I failed to start up again (the number one being, obviously, my incredibly time-consuming son) was perhaps a maturing of sorts. I suddenly realised, after becoming a mum, that I had to shed a lot of layers and simplify my life. It was an awakening of sorts. I realised I no longer knew how to write just for the sake of writing, and that I was writing for others more than myself. I feared that being a mummy blogger would mean I would lose a lot of my readers who may no longer identify with me, that I would stumble into that all-consuming vacuum of baking cookies and going to play dates and never be able to get out.
Most of all I guess I feared criticism. Of being told that I'm wrong, I'm a bad mother, my methods and my ways are unorthodox. And as anyone that is a writer knows, if you're gonna to put it out there you are bound to have haters. Hey, I have haters even without a blog - someone wrote in criticising my fashion column not long ago and I absolutely LOVED it! It made me feel so empowered and ignited a spark in me. It may have been then that I decided I needed to write, write more, write well, and with the same ferocity as before, if not more.
So here's a recap of what's gone down in the past year...
I gave birth to a beautiful, healthy, and incredibly loved baby boy - last week was his first birthday :) I made the mistake of resuming work (from home) 1 month after I had him, and then the bigger mistake of continuing to work remotely while I was on vacation back home when he was 3 months old. Breastfeeding every 2hrs throughout the night, socialising with friends, and trying to catch up on work often at 4am in the morning resulted in a physical breakdown. I got a severe case of pneumonia and was on a hospital drip for 2 weeks. It was so bad that they thought I had TB and treated me like a leper in the isolation room. Everyone that came in had to wear a gown and a mask, I was not allowed out, and noone wanted to touch me. That's how I spent my first Mother's Day. Husbandless. Childless. Thank God for my mum who kept everything together for Little J and brought him in once a day so that I could let him cling desperately to my breast, sucking whatever driblet of milk I could muster up in the wake of all that medication.
Eventually I gave up as the illness left me dry and milkless and my useless mammary glands were no longer of any use to my boy, save for a couple of soft moulds on which he would leech onto for comfort. At that point, he could very well have been that half-vampire baby Renesmee killing me slowly...
But I resurrected myself and went back to the office. It was a decision that had taken me 6 months to make, and one that I do not regret. I thought Jaydon would hate me, that he would only want the nanny, but the truth is he loves me like nothing else! When I am home he clings to my legs and jumps up and down, demanding attention and hugs. He knows his mummy, and is a confident and deliriously happy boy. I am blessed.
The first year of motherhood in a nutshell? A series of ups and downs, of balancing acts, of not having the time or energy to speak more than 3 words to my husband a night (which were usually "get the milk"). In hindsight, I think my marriage was spread so thin that I give new meaning to the words "a mile wide but an inch deep"... I felt like I was trying to do everything at once but not a single thing was done properly.
Our trip to NYC & Hawaii was a savior of sorts. At the very least, we had full meals without interruption and sex two nights in a row. I missed my son terribly but it was definately good for my marriage.
It was a year of doing crazy dances - both figuratively and literally. Of alternating between jumping around like a chimpanzee to make my little one laugh to kowtowing to him with tears in my eyes, begging him to go the f* to sleep...
I still remember the time in Sydney when I drove one-handed down George street whilst clutching my boob with my breast pump in the other, frantically calling my friends on the hands free to let them know that - yes, indeed I will be on time for the movie - while the guy in the lane next to me just gawked. That was seriously a low point.
So now, here I am. Writing whatever comes to me, and feeling like that's exactly how I will continue. I would like this blog to become a collection of thoughts, rather than a documentation of what I've been doing lately. Hope that doesn't bore you all to bits, but I think I'll leave facebook to do the updating of the daily milestones and this to be an online journal for my grandkids to laugh about one day.
Right now I am packing for a trip to China for NYE, sans husband but with baby in tow. Jaydon's third trip overseas, and it just gets harder... Hope this spark remains with me when I get back!
Here's the 1 year video I made for his birthday party:
And a few recent pics:
Will try to update once a week from now on! Thanks for coming back all :)
G xxx
Tuesday, 21 December 2010
Merry Early Xmas!!
I had a massive scare today! My friend Becky (who is also pregnant) had a HUGE complication after delivering her baby boy - she started hemorrhaging and lost so much blood that she had to be transferred to another hospital for a blood transfusion. It made me realise that birth can sometimes be a risky thing!! Thank God she is stable now in the Intensive Care Unit, and she has a healthy boy, Owen Michael Shaw, awaiting her when she recovers :) CONGRATS to Becky & Dave!!!
Can't wait for our real Xmas Day in hospital with Nugget! Hope I get good pressies hahaha ~~ ;p
Tomorrow I'm being admitted into hospital and the next day I will meet my little one - I am so excited and can't wait to see and hold him!! Will ask Steve to post up a short birth announcement on this blog when he's ready, but will probably not have time to blog again myself for a long time. Thanks so much to everyone for reading and commenting all these years - there have been so many times when I have wanted to stop but didn't because of you guys. Awww... *tear*
Take care everyone, and Merry Xmas. Mucho luv to you all ~!!!
Gracie xxxxoooo
Meanwhile, some pics of me & my sis enjoying our time before the baby arrives:
AND... our Early Xmas Party!!! Here are the kiddies & Noodlely in her Santa outfit with her new haircut :)
Playing the white elephant game - it's Secret Santa with a twist where you can steal gifts off each other:
The whole gang enjoying our potluck dinner & hanging around. Me & Becky comparing tummies~!!
The whole gang enjoying our potluck dinner & hanging around. Me & Becky comparing tummies~!!
Can't wait for our real Xmas Day in hospital with Nugget! Hope I get good pressies hahaha ~~ ;p
OK I just want to take a moment now to say a big THANK YOU for all the encouraging emails and messages I have recieved from friends here and back home. I feel so blessed to have all of you in my life...
Here's my study wall all dedicated to family, husband and friends :) Not completed yet, obviously - it will be finished when Nugget joins us in the world ♥
(btw my mum took those pics on the right 1 month after having me! Hope I bounce back that quickly as well...)
Tomorrow I'm being admitted into hospital and the next day I will meet my little one - I am so excited and can't wait to see and hold him!! Will ask Steve to post up a short birth announcement on this blog when he's ready, but will probably not have time to blog again myself for a long time. Thanks so much to everyone for reading and commenting all these years - there have been so many times when I have wanted to stop but didn't because of you guys. Awww... *tear*
Take care everyone, and Merry Xmas. Mucho luv to you all ~!!!
Gracie xxxxoooo
Sunday, 19 December 2010
Yay Nursery DONE!
Ok blogging has been such a chore lately,SO SORRY TO EVERYONE that told me not to stop blogging, but I think I can really only manage one more after this, and then I'll be on hiatus for a while... maybe forever?
I'm pleased to say I finally completely finished the nursery though! I was gonna write up this long post about all the stuff that you need in a nursery for other pregnant friends, but now I really can't be bothered :( I can share some pics though, and if anyone wants to know where I got stuff from just email me!
I also got a lots of different toys, bottles, bibs, burp cloths, clotes, books, and a whole stack of post-partum "getting body back" stuff like the Belly Bandit, Shrinx Hips and Anita Re-belt Girdle - I hope they work!!
Will blog again before I go to hopsital!
xxoo
I'm pleased to say I finally completely finished the nursery though! I was gonna write up this long post about all the stuff that you need in a nursery for other pregnant friends, but now I really can't be bothered :( I can share some pics though, and if anyone wants to know where I got stuff from just email me!
Hanging up and folding the stacks of clothes we got as gifts - this is my fave chillout room now :)
Nugget's ZZzzzz zone:
Some necessities - Stokke Stroller & accessories, Maxi-Cosi Mico carseat, My Little Lamb swing, Diaper Champ bin, wheely change trolley, Bumbo chair:
Medela breast pump, bathtub & toys, Breast cream/pads and other essentials, Itzbeen timer, Baby monitors to watch him on:
Stuffed toy area (not full yet), baby calender, Burberry & Chloe baby bags, swaddles & blankies :)
I also got a lots of different toys, bottles, bibs, burp cloths, clotes, books, and a whole stack of post-partum "getting body back" stuff like the Belly Bandit, Shrinx Hips and Anita Re-belt Girdle - I hope they work!!
Will blog again before I go to hopsital!
xxoo
Tuesday, 7 December 2010
36 weeks~~!!!
WHOA! Can't believe I'm almost there already... in another week Nugget will be considered full term and then soon after I'll be getting my c-section. Then I guess my life will be over and I'll never blog again. I still haven't made a decision yet, but I think that if I do contine to blog, it will be sporadic and nonsensical. And not sure who really wants to read about baby stuff all the time anyway. Might be better just to quit and only update my private BFF page on facebook instead - btw please let me know if I have accidentally left you out of the group. If I have, I'm sorry!! I will add u as soon as you let me know :D
Ok, so past few weeks have been ultra busy with mum here, buying the rest of the baby stuff, interviewing new maids for the full-time position, brunches and etc. Photo-taking has taken a back burner cos I just can't be bothered and plus I've gained 18kg so how good can I look in pictures?? There's one pic someone tagged me in facebook of my ass that I just had to remove cos I looked like an elephant DIESSS. Mum fired the cook cos she said the food was too oily (sad) and is making me light foods, so at least my weight gain has petered (in fact, stopped for the last week) so I'm happy to say that I probably wont exceed 20kg by the end of this. Phew!
I've been having some anxiety attacks that have me waking up at 4am in the morning every day for the last week. I'm starting to get worried about what will happen at night as Steve & I decided that he wont sleep with me when he has work cos he really needs to concentrate. I'm getting freaked out about being alone with the baby 5 nights a week, breastfeeding every 2hrs without any help!! Someone criticised me the other day for not getting a 24hr doumi (certified nurse) to help out in the beginning - were they just trying to scare me? :( ...
Nugget is getting lower now and really crushing my cha-cha and bladder. I wee all the time when I laugh/cough LOL. Also can no longer take off boots by myself, walk for longer than an hour without my back giving in, nor can I sit still in a straight position for too long without wanting to lie down flat. I've been waking up after 4-5hrs sleep by default every day now, started reading the baby's first year books, getting tutored on breastfeeding by the doula, got my full-time maid ready to start, chosen and booked my room at the hospital, no longer sleeping with Noodle so that she can get used to someone else being no.1 (sorry noodlely), dealt with the fact that husband cannot be in the operating room and that I will get my hands tied down (damn Korean hospitals) and be in a lot of pain... so I guess I'm as ready as I can be. The nursery is complete now and looks.... adorable!! Can't wait to take pics and put it up on my next post.
Here's what we've been up to lately..
My sister is arriving from London next week, I'M SO EXCITED!!! She has already recieved 2 scholarships to prestigious music schools there, what a star. She'll be bringing Xmas, Nugget's birth and all my online UK shopping with her ~~ ahhhh...
xxoo
Ok, so past few weeks have been ultra busy with mum here, buying the rest of the baby stuff, interviewing new maids for the full-time position, brunches and etc. Photo-taking has taken a back burner cos I just can't be bothered and plus I've gained 18kg so how good can I look in pictures?? There's one pic someone tagged me in facebook of my ass that I just had to remove cos I looked like an elephant DIESSS. Mum fired the cook cos she said the food was too oily (sad) and is making me light foods, so at least my weight gain has petered (in fact, stopped for the last week) so I'm happy to say that I probably wont exceed 20kg by the end of this. Phew!
I've been having some anxiety attacks that have me waking up at 4am in the morning every day for the last week. I'm starting to get worried about what will happen at night as Steve & I decided that he wont sleep with me when he has work cos he really needs to concentrate. I'm getting freaked out about being alone with the baby 5 nights a week, breastfeeding every 2hrs without any help!! Someone criticised me the other day for not getting a 24hr doumi (certified nurse) to help out in the beginning - were they just trying to scare me? :( ...
Nugget is getting lower now and really crushing my cha-cha and bladder. I wee all the time when I laugh/cough LOL. Also can no longer take off boots by myself, walk for longer than an hour without my back giving in, nor can I sit still in a straight position for too long without wanting to lie down flat. I've been waking up after 4-5hrs sleep by default every day now, started reading the baby's first year books, getting tutored on breastfeeding by the doula, got my full-time maid ready to start, chosen and booked my room at the hospital, no longer sleeping with Noodle so that she can get used to someone else being no.1 (sorry noodlely), dealt with the fact that husband cannot be in the operating room and that I will get my hands tied down (damn Korean hospitals) and be in a lot of pain... so I guess I'm as ready as I can be. The nursery is complete now and looks.... adorable!! Can't wait to take pics and put it up on my next post.
Here's what we've been up to lately..
Shitty wax museam that was en route to the show we were watching @ 63 Building:
Thanksgiving dinner @ Dorothys - look at that turkey, it's bigger than the baby (and she made 2 of them!!):
Second Thanksgiving dinner @ our place - aren't my cups lovely!
Mum's getting excited about the baby coming, she can't stop playing with Liam hehe:
Hannah's trunk show for her bespoke jewellery brand Palén Design hosted @ our place. She made the living room look so fab with all this studio lighting and the jewellery was just gorgeous:
Getting in all our brunches before it's too late!
My sister is arriving from London next week, I'M SO EXCITED!!! She has already recieved 2 scholarships to prestigious music schools there, what a star. She'll be bringing Xmas, Nugget's birth and all my online UK shopping with her ~~ ahhhh...
xxoo
Friday, 3 December 2010
Secret to a happy marriage
So I've been asked by so many people lately what the secret to a happy marriage is - although I dont think I'm an expert in this area, I do have a very strong opinion on the neccessary ingredients, and I have to say that love, on it's own, is not enough. I see all of my friends who are happily married and I have to say the thing they have in common is... respect. With respect come patience, understanding, loyalty - and it also means that the person will bite their tongue when they want to call you a f*%$*& idiot.
Here's Gracie's lowdown on what makes a marriage work:
1) Do not swear at each other when angry. Don't slam doors, walk out the house, blame the other person for things that happened before. The best way to respect someone is to stay grounded when all u want to do is strangle them and call them a retarded monkey. Don't get me wrong, we make these mistakes all the time - so when you fail, which will be often, see point 2.
2) When point 1 cannot be avoided, let it go and consciously make an effort to make up that very day, if not immediately. Never go to bed without solving all issues. It breeds agitation & resentment and tears the two of you further apart. Trust me, pride is not something you should be looking for in a husband, uh-uh sista! A man that is not willing to say sorry (especially if he's NOT wrong) is not husband material. Marry the guy that can recognize how to salvage a situation, and not how to make sure he wins or gets his point across. And don't even think of marrying someone in the hopes that you can change him... see next point.
3) People don't change. They may in little ways, or try to in bigger ways - but the fact is a goat is a goat is a goat. So choose wisely and once you have, don't regret your decision. Never compare against others and love your husband for all his strengths, but even more so for his weaknesses. Those things that are not so great about him should be the reason why he has you - to balance him out DUH. Cos you're obviously perfect and have no faults. Holla. Once you think of it that way, you will feel more empowered instead of resentful.
4) Finally, marry someone that thinks you're the bees knees. I find it ridiculous that people put strict rules on the guy having to be a rich cunt, over 180cm, and owns heaps of shit. Uh... I've been there and ppl like that are usually mentally deranged, have a psycho step-mum, and/or have Hep B. Yes - those are facts.
The real secret to a happy marriage is finding someone that always puts you first. Case in point: I'd rather have a guy that has $1 and gives me $1 than a guy who has millions and gives me $100k.
I hope that somewhat answers the question. I might not be right, but at least this is what is right for me. And with this, I want to be THANKFUL for my ruthlessly temperamental, infinately flawed, goose of a husband. He's gonna be a great dad :D
I found an old pic of that night 3 years ago when we "officially" started dating hehe...
xxoo
Here's Gracie's lowdown on what makes a marriage work:
1) Do not swear at each other when angry. Don't slam doors, walk out the house, blame the other person for things that happened before. The best way to respect someone is to stay grounded when all u want to do is strangle them and call them a retarded monkey. Don't get me wrong, we make these mistakes all the time - so when you fail, which will be often, see point 2.
2) When point 1 cannot be avoided, let it go and consciously make an effort to make up that very day, if not immediately. Never go to bed without solving all issues. It breeds agitation & resentment and tears the two of you further apart. Trust me, pride is not something you should be looking for in a husband, uh-uh sista! A man that is not willing to say sorry (especially if he's NOT wrong) is not husband material. Marry the guy that can recognize how to salvage a situation, and not how to make sure he wins or gets his point across. And don't even think of marrying someone in the hopes that you can change him... see next point.
3) People don't change. They may in little ways, or try to in bigger ways - but the fact is a goat is a goat is a goat. So choose wisely and once you have, don't regret your decision. Never compare against others and love your husband for all his strengths, but even more so for his weaknesses. Those things that are not so great about him should be the reason why he has you - to balance him out DUH. Cos you're obviously perfect and have no faults. Holla. Once you think of it that way, you will feel more empowered instead of resentful.
4) Finally, marry someone that thinks you're the bees knees. I find it ridiculous that people put strict rules on the guy having to be a rich cunt, over 180cm, and owns heaps of shit. Uh... I've been there and ppl like that are usually mentally deranged, have a psycho step-mum, and/or have Hep B. Yes - those are facts.
The real secret to a happy marriage is finding someone that always puts you first. Case in point: I'd rather have a guy that has $1 and gives me $1 than a guy who has millions and gives me $100k.
I hope that somewhat answers the question. I might not be right, but at least this is what is right for me. And with this, I want to be THANKFUL for my ruthlessly temperamental, infinately flawed, goose of a husband. He's gonna be a great dad :D
I found an old pic of that night 3 years ago when we "officially" started dating hehe...
Nov 2007 @ Trademark Hotel in Sydney's Kings Cross:
xxoo
Sunday, 28 November 2010
Happy 2yr Anniversary ♥
WOW it's been 2yrs already since the humble day we signed our names in that local registry in Taipei, and a year since our beautiful wedding blessing in Sydney - how time flies!
This year, being 35weeks pregnant, we couldn't really go anywhere special so we decided just to have a nice dinner and exchange gifts that we made for each other. Little did we know, we were both thinking the same thing - our "personally made" gifts to each other were both books!
Yums degustation:
Great service, they gave us an entire cake!
This year, being 35weeks pregnant, we couldn't really go anywhere special so we decided just to have a nice dinner and exchange gifts that we made for each other. Little did we know, we were both thinking the same thing - our "personally made" gifts to each other were both books!
MINE - its a 25page book about why I love him (I wrote it and drew all the pics myself - so proud hehe):
and HIS - an erotic fiction about Grace & Steven, with smatterings of other people and things in our lives thrown in. A really intriguing read!!
But we both went against the rules and bought other gifts for each other haha~~ I guess being married for 2yrs make you think alike? The best is my push gift - a Tiffany celebration ring, which I will engrave with Nugget's name when he is born :)
Mum took pics for us as we were leaving the house. This is my other mink coat that she gave me - another push gift? haha... LOVE!!!
We celebrated at the Ninth Gate Grill @ the Westin - fabulous restaurant and even better view of the oriental gardens. Really lovely :)
Yums degustation:
Great service, they gave us an entire cake!
During the dinner, Steve was soooo cute. He got all nervous and said he had another gift for me - and then he started reciting Oscar Wilde's "To My Wife" He kept getting it wrong and had to take this piece of paper out of his pocket to check the words hehe. Oh, it was really sweet ~~ and then I realised that was why he was talking to himself in the shower earlier LOL.
This is year so special for us - little Nugget will be born in 3 weeks and we will spend out first Xmas together with him. We are so blessed to have everything that we do, praise God!!
To My Wife - Oscar Wilde
I can write no stately proem
As a prelude to my lay;
From a poet to a poem
I would dare to say.
For if of these fallen petals
One to you seem fair,
Love will waft it till it settles
On your hair.
And when wind and winter harden
All the loveless land,
It will whisper of the garden,
You will understand.
And there is nothing left to do
But to kiss once again, and part,
Nay, there is nothing we should rue,
I have my beauty,-you your Art,
Nay, do not start,
One world was not enough for two
Like me and you.
xxoo
Monday, 22 November 2010
Update & (another) Baby Shower!!
So the update on my placenta is that it is still too low for a natural birth - it didn't move at all for the last month BOOO!! I think cos I got so excited that it had moved last time, I totally forgot about resting and started running around and ruined it. OH WELLS it is still much better than before. And at least now we have a date for the c-section scheduled in for before Xmas so that is really soon!
The other sad news is that I am still sick as a dog *woof*. Seriously, pregnancy sickness sucks balls, I spend the whole night coughing up phlegm and trying to breathe through my mouth and if I see another lemon after this I will prob stab my eye with a blunt shovel. Ughs. At least I have my MUMMY here!! She's doing everything for me and I can order her around without feeling bad like I sometimes do with the maid. And she's helping me interview for a full-time helper to start right after Nugget is born :)
She also told me that I'm too fat, which is totally true. Actually I thought I was quite fine up until last week when my face suddenly ballooned and now I look like a chipmunk gathering nuts for winter. BLERGHHHHH.
Now to the exciting part - our friends in Seoul organised Becky & I an awesome baby shower on the weekend, and it was so much fun! They went to so much trouble, I'm so blessed to have all these wonderful people in my life, and even luckier that I got 2 showers. Thank you God for bringing so much love into our lives ♥
I got my mink coat!! And guess what else - my mum gave me her brand new one too, so now I have 2 super luxurious, ridiculously priced, totally amoral items of animal. Each mink coat is 50 dead female minks, how sad is that? But we wear leather, rabbit and fox collars and plus aren't there heaps of minks in the world...? They might get eaten by a lion if they're not made into coats right?
My team's baby is the retarded pink one on the left, and Steve's team is that purple one that looks like an Orc from Lord of the Rings. The winning team was orange, cos they had a safety pin on a diaper. So skilled.
You can tell Ryan (top right) won the other game where u have to steal pegs off people when they say the words "baby, boy, & pregnant". By the end of the night I think he pretty much had everyone's pegs lol.
ARghhhh... maybe I'll gain less with the next one, I think most ppl tend to gain more with the first cos you have no idea what you're doing...
Besides Becky, I have 2 other friends due at the same time as me and guess what they are ALL BOYS... my Nugget is gonna have a hard time finding a mate when he grows up~~!!
Thanksgiving this Thursday! We're having 2 Thanksgiving dinners on the weeked - YUM TURKEY CAN'T WAIT. Plz plz plz let me get better by then!
xxoo
The other sad news is that I am still sick as a dog *woof*. Seriously, pregnancy sickness sucks balls, I spend the whole night coughing up phlegm and trying to breathe through my mouth and if I see another lemon after this I will prob stab my eye with a blunt shovel. Ughs. At least I have my MUMMY here!! She's doing everything for me and I can order her around without feeling bad like I sometimes do with the maid. And she's helping me interview for a full-time helper to start right after Nugget is born :)
She also told me that I'm too fat, which is totally true. Actually I thought I was quite fine up until last week when my face suddenly ballooned and now I look like a chipmunk gathering nuts for winter. BLERGHHHHH.
Now to the exciting part - our friends in Seoul organised Becky & I an awesome baby shower on the weekend, and it was so much fun! They went to so much trouble, I'm so blessed to have all these wonderful people in my life, and even luckier that I got 2 showers. Thank you God for bringing so much love into our lives ♥
Setting up - what a great sign!
I got my mink coat!! And guess what else - my mum gave me her brand new one too, so now I have 2 super luxurious, ridiculously priced, totally amoral items of animal. Each mink coat is 50 dead female minks, how sad is that? But we wear leather, rabbit and fox collars and plus aren't there heaps of minks in the world...? They might get eaten by a lion if they're not made into coats right?
In the kitchen - check out all the food they prepared! I was ravenous... nom nom~~
Making a baby out of play-doh. It was HARD. I kept wanting to give ours a circumcised penis but it didn't turn out so well...
My team's baby is the retarded pink one on the left, and Steve's team is that purple one that looks like an Orc from Lord of the Rings. The winning team was orange, cos they had a safety pin on a diaper. So skilled.
Our team totally failed the next game too, cos Dave almost threw up the baby food!! It must have been groooooosss. But Dorothy was a good sport and sucked that bottle til the end, even though we were already out of the game hahahaha
You can tell Ryan (top right) won the other game where u have to steal pegs off people when they say the words "baby, boy, & pregnant". By the end of the night I think he pretty much had everyone's pegs lol.
Me & Becky's adorable cake!
Family + Group shots:
Some of my presents. YAY!!! I am almost fully stocked and ready to go now :D
Last group shot. On the right is what happens when you're not fast enough for the timer...
Btw my friends Jay & Mandy just had their 2nd little boy in Shanghai. What a cutie!
She was skinny her entire pregnancy, unlike me... I think she only gained 9kgs with the second one, I've gained double :( See??
ARghhhh... maybe I'll gain less with the next one, I think most ppl tend to gain more with the first cos you have no idea what you're doing...
Besides Becky, I have 2 other friends due at the same time as me and guess what they are ALL BOYS... my Nugget is gonna have a hard time finding a mate when he grows up~~!!
Thanksgiving this Thursday! We're having 2 Thanksgiving dinners on the weeked - YUM TURKEY CAN'T WAIT. Plz plz plz let me get better by then!
xxoo
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