3 cities, 3 hotels... 3 Chinas

Who said China was all the same?

We all know that it has a million faces, and this trip with the in-laws proved that once again... China has outsmarted me. Apart from discovering Froggie's roots, I also realised that being married to someone means that you are also marrying their family. Someone has told me that once before, but now it has become a fact of my life.

Good thing they are a lovely family.

I've just gotten back to Taipei, met my own mother at HK airport during the transfer, and now she is staying with us for a couple of weeks before we go on our honeymoon. It's just parents galore this month!

But back to my recount of this trip to China. I will summarise, and put the rest of the pictures up on facebook.

FIRST STOP: SHENZHEN

The city of a million different faces - it is a melting pot of Chinese from all different cities who want a better life but cant quite make it to HK. It's also the home of the dad's side of Froggie's family.

BEST BIT:

Need I say more?

WORST BIT:

Trekking up and down these ridiculous paths for hours on end in this scenic place that we went. My calfs were dying and my butt was all stiff and I didnt feel like I lost any weight. BOO.

THE FAMILY:


So lovely and accomodating. Cousins took us everywhere, got massages and spas, went out for drinks, but the best bit was the Granny. OMG she is sooooo cute! She just smiles all the time and looks really happy, its adorable. Grandad is 92 and really sick, but made it out of bed to tell me to give me a grandson. LOLOLOL!! Here he is and look how happy he is (and how happy we are pretending to be:

THE REST:

Being a butterfly, Hollywood kissing, and getting carried around everywhere cos I was tired...


SECOND STOP: CHANGSHA

Hometown of Mao and other great men like Tan Dun and Froggie, I have often been told that people from here have killer drive and are stellar achievers. But I also discovered that it's a beautiful city of mountains and rivers and hidden gems...

BEST BIT:

The underground live music venue Froggie's cousin took us to. It had no name, but housed great musicians in an intimate if not somewhat dingy basement. I was enthralled! I loved it!

So much that I even bought a ripoff T-shirt from the first band cos I thought they were so great. Awww... im such a sucker.

WORST BIT:

BUT ALSO THE BEST BIT... was the continuous banquets and overload of Hunan food (which is spicy and I LOVE) but also very very oily, not to mention there is TURPENTINE disguised as Chinese white wine (I am convinced) which almost killed me...

THE FAMILY:

Lovely, lovely lovely. Fun cousins, cute grandparents and aunts... and a grandma who kept slapping my thighs really hard while announcing "Good wife! Good wife!" Oh *hearts*....


THE REST:

Going up on Yuelu Mountain and looking down on Xiang River and Mao's house, going on another ferris wheel (the 3rd largest in Asia) and making a pact to conquer all ferris wheels over 120m... well, I made a pact - he just nodded somewhat hesitantly...

FINAL STOP: SHANGHAI

I need a new post for this, cos the best bits was everything! Coming up...

The in-laws in Taipei

I'm leaving for China shortly so no time to write anything. I'll let the pictures speak for themselves. And yes, I look crap in every picture but that's because I've been SICK you MOFOS!!

The Honeymoon...

.... which has swiftly turned into "The Nightmare".

Firstly, we still dont know where we're going and it is 3 weeks away!! We started off wanting to go to to South America and Caribbean but there were so many countries on our list - Brazil, Peru, Argentina, Jamaica, Haiti - we calculated that the transit and travel time is 60hrs+.... NOOOOOOOO!!

Oh and the cheapest hotel in Rio during this time is like US$600 a night. BLAH. And cos the travel time is so long (24hours? And its not even direct) we would have to fly Business Class so the honeymoon will cost 2 arms and a leg... and we'll be so tired from the travel and jetlag it wont even be worth it.

Now we're considering the Maldives and I want india but he wants to climb some stupid mountain in Malaysia...??? WTF...

Its called Mount Kinabalu and looks like this:



UMMM...

Can you imagine me trekking up that redic looking thing for 3 days in high altitude in freezing climate? Um... NO.

Fun honeymoon it is not.

So anyway... poor Froggie has been staying up til 4am trying to plan this out. The problem is that we will be there during Xmas and New Years and everything is either completely booked out this late in the game, or exorbently priced...

SIGHS!

I personally dont mind at all where we go as long as its not the stupid mountain and I can get tanned and look like that 007 girl. HEEHEE...

But I think Froggie doesn't wanna disppoint me so he's trying extra hard! So sweet! Hope he keeps this up after marriage and doesnt turn into a loser like one of my colleague's husband (who she is trying to divorce atm)...

ARGH. I'm still sick... (but slightly skinny!! HOORAY!)

Pic's from in-laws visit soon...

And we're flying out to Shenzhen and Changsha tomorrow morning with them and I'll get to meet all of Froggie's family from both sides. Excitement! And then finishing up in Shanghai with my FUCKING AWESOME friends for a MAAAAAAD weekend.

Toodles!

New addition to the Team!

I'm actually dying of a mysterious illness at the moment... I can hardly keep my eyes open at work, the in-laws are here visiting, and Froggie is really stressed out trying to plan this last-minute 1 month long honeymoon in 2 days....

UGH

But at least we had a dog come visit the office yesterday!

This is Link, my boss' son's new miniature poodle:

So adorable! And LOOK! He's the same size as the little teddy bear heehee:

P.S. Yes, that is a wedding band... it was meant to be a surprise but everyone's ruined it already! BOO! We bought them from Tiffanys but I didnt want to make a big HOOHA about it until we actually get registered this month. But we have started wearing them already (LOL... sooooo against the rulz but oh-so-Gracie&Froggie-style) and everyone's asking so yea... heehee

I HATE THIS WOMAN

and I am totally jealous of these GORGEOUS BALENCIAGA BAGS!!!!


GROWL!!!!!!!!!!!

I wanted to get one from the SOGO sale but they were still almost 70,000NT (AUS$3,000) after the discount and they only had stoopid colours left like lime green and black. BLAH!!!! There was a Big Apple Red one that was nice but ALAS I totally cannot afford it after all the splurging I did this month on the sale already. I'm not even gonna take pics of the stuff I bought for fear of Froggie finding out that I bought a lot more than I let on....

Hmmm....

and, um... did i mention that I HATE YOU SAMANTHA.

6 types of men to avoid

Being so disgustingly sick and revolting had sucked me of any originality and left me devoid of creative juices so I will instead plagarize from someone else's work, the best thing to do when unsure of what else to do.

According to smh.com's Sam & the City blog, there are 6 types of men that we should all avoid. And can I just say... these men exist in our very own living rooms! Excuse my blatant transparancy, but the prototypes strangely resonate with the names of a few people's partners that I know.... ahem!!

MR ARROGANCE

Ever noticed that you're dating someone you think is funny, articulate and smart, and all of a sudden they'll pull out the old, "Oh baby, I can get anyone I want, so you should be lucky you're dating me" card? Believe me when I say things can morph quickly from sensual, sexy and fun to downright rude, insensitive and self-obsessed. By the way, arrogance should not be confused with confidence, which is the ultimate aphrodisiac.

THE ONE WITH A RAGING TEMPER

They might not show this trait immediately, but if you have even a tiny inkling that your man might be a ranging lunatic, it's time to get out, and fast. While this dude might tell you that his temper is strictly reserved for everyone but you, you don't want to wait till you've creased his shirt to discover that his anger gets a whole lot worse when it's pointed at your face.

THE CONTROL FREAK

Despite him being seemingly relaxed in the beginning, when your man begins to ask questions about your whereabouts, texts incessantly, tells you what to eat, how many sit-ups to do and how to do your job better, then you know you're in deep trouble. Introducing the control freak: he's the man who, no matter what you are doing or where you are going, will assume that you're sleeping around or doing the dirty behind his back. While his insecurities are clearly pegged right onto your back, don't think that it's ever going to get any easier.

THE WORKAHOLIC

He's hard working, earns loads of money and appears clued up about everything from politics to pashminas. He's obsessed with everything and anything that might improve himself and spends the entire date on his BlackBerry wondering how his stock portfolio is going. The problem in this equation is simply this: you. This dude is so obsessed with his career, making money and climbing the corporate ladder that, unfortunately, you, sweet girlfriend, come in at a distant second. He's always, (albeit genuinely) working late; spends more time on his laptop than he does canoodling with you in bed, and when you do have any spare time together he is often too tired to have a heart-to-heart, let alone get it up.

THE WOMANISER

You probably know the one: he believes he's uber-smart, sexy, courteous, funny, ridiculously handsome and sweeps you away like a beach house in a hurricane. The trouble arrives when you make the gut-wrenching discovery that you're not the only woman on his speed dial.

Candace Bushnell, creator of Sex And The City, calls them "toxic bachelors"; I call them "bad boys" and my friend Jade refers to them as bona fide "playboys". On a date, he's more likely to spend the entire night chatting up the waitress than focusing on you. He pervs on everything with two legs and a pair of breasts and is quick to let you know which famous actress or supermodel once left their underwear on his couch.

THE CHEAPSKATE

Finally, there's the cheapskate. He complains how expensive dinner was, refuses to give you $2 for the parking meter (you had to drive so he would save petrol), doesn't tip the waiter and complains when you wear a new pair of shoes claiming you spend way too much cash on unnecessary things ... Enough said.

I feel the need to add a couple more to the list:

The Going-to-Massage-Parlours-Is-Not-Cheating Man
The I'm-Still-In-Love-With-My-Ex Man
The I-Always-Put-My-Mum-Before-You Man
and my favorite...
The I-Dont-Have-Money-For-A-Ring-Right-Now Man

Meanwhile this is a complete digression but I wanna see High School Musical 3 so BAD!!!



I watched 007 the other day and it was boring as hell, except for her:

Have decided to "dirty" myself up and get all tanned like that when I'm holidaying in South America. Hmmm... have also decided Ukrainian women are next on my LOVE list after Brazilians...


YUMMY Yum Yum!

Towards Modernity

I just cannot help but comment on this picture of the Obama's visiting the Bush's at their to-be new home the White House.

Is this picture not the epitome of a symbolic leap forward....?

The Bush couple - a picture of boredom, stoic and taciturn monotony aka. an unrelenting White America vis a vis the Obama couple - strong, modern, transcient and youthful.

And might I note that Mrs FUGS Bush is in dire need of a stylist, a hairdresser and a tan.

'Nuff said.

Brazilian Bikinis

We're planning our honeymoon to South America & the Caribbean at the moment, and I'm so excited about seeing hot chicks in Rio!

And I'm gonna get some HOT bikinis HOOHAH!!!

Here's a taste from the Claro Rio Summer fashion show:

HOT HOT HOT!!

And I'm gonna spend my days searching for Gisele, and then stalking her, and then kissing her when I find her *glee*

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... Yummmmmmmmssss!!

Mike's Bday @ Cali Grill aka. the Licking Party

aka. We All Wanna Be Pornstars

Well, it started off innocently enough, with everyone donating to Animals Taiwan:


... looking sweet & pretty:

One big happy family:


... but then something strange happened.

We decided to share a drink:


... and the rest is ... well, um, lickworthy history:



YEA BABY